Teen Problems and Solutions

Well a little about me I’m 20 years old been with the same girl for 5 years and now were going through a divorce and its seriously been ripping me apart lately. We got married in April of last year, when I had just finished Marine Corps MCT. (I’m in the marines). I was so happy with her and I thought I found my love my happiness and joy so early in life and I was so excited about it.

That’s what made our separation so hard on me, is because I didn’t even see it coming she just told me one day after work she didn’t love me and was moving back in with her mom. She left a week later and won’t return my calls or messages. When she finally did all she had to say was it was for the best and that she was happy.

I don’t know what to do anymore I’m falling to pieces here. I’m about to lose my house, all the furniture we bought together, the animals, all the dreams everything! I work 12 to 14 hours a day for the last three weeks and I’m so stressed out. I know it’s time to move on but I don’t know how. How do I begin to feel better? What’s next? Because right now it feels like my world is caving in all around me. Please I’m looking for serious advice here if you are just going to be a prick don’t waste my time

Lets be honest here, I don’t think there’s much that I am going to be able to say here to make it better. As someone else already mentioned, I could tell you “It was for the best”, but that does you little to no good. That being said I can relate, I am 19 years old myself. I was in a four yearlong relationship, we were high school sweethearts, and the moment we went to college it all changed. That being said we were never married, we never shared a home together. So the best I can do is take the pain I felt and multiple that a few times, and hope I am getting somewhere remotely close.

For me it took meeting someone else who caught my interest to really truly and fully move on. For months I used the age-old idea of faking it until it happened, and while it never fully removed the pain it made it bearable. The real fix was chopping her out of my life for good, which happened when I met another girl. Now that other girl and I didn’t work out but when we were all said and done I was okay with the fact my ex and I were over. Now again I was only together for four years, and never married so we didn’t have a completely intertwined life like you and your wife.

As bazar as it may sound, talking to someone may help. Therapists exist for this reason, but I also can totally understand and respect not being a fan of them. So a good buddy or friend is always another good option and just vent, and or write out your thoughts and emotions. You might just shock yourself with how much you feel better after writing it all out.

Above all less keep your head up, don’t let this overtake you. Also know your not alone in this, there’s sadly many others who have experienced this pain before and countless more who will.

Okay so its early September I just started my junior year, Jr. Prom isn’t until March 23rd. I am going to ask my best friend. We have always had a flirty more than friends thing going on. We have gone out before, she has liked me when I have liked someone else, I have liked her when she has liked someone else, that kind of back and forth thing.

I have know for years that I would ask her to Jr. Prom and Senior Prom and we have jokingly talked about it before and she has said before that we will go but she has had feelings for me when she has said that and like I said we are always back and forth so its unclear whether or not she still would want to go.

Anyhow, I was wondering when is too early to ask her to prom because, I obviously really want to take her and I really don’t want somebody else to ask her first. Our homecoming dance/weekend is on Sept. 23rd and that’s not really a big deal in our school, people don’t ask people to that its nothing at our school but her and I always kind of go together. We go in together, we hang out and dance the whole time, hand holding, that general thing but like I said nobody asks anybody to that dance. So I was contemplating just bringing up, Jr. Prom at Homecoming and saying something along the lines of

“hmmmm our next dance isn’t until Jr. Prom, I know it’s early but I want to snag you before somebody else does. You are you so I’m sure plenty of people will ask you but in the rare almost impossible case that, that doesn’t happen do you want to go with me? I only am saying it like that because I don’t want to make you think you have to go with me and I don’t want to hold you back haha, if you don’t want to I’m a big boy I can handle it”

Typically I wouldn’t recommend rushing into asking someone to prom, because you never know what is going to happen in the next 6 months let alone the next 6 days. Besides half the fun of Prom is getting to be creative about asking the girl to prom. That being said it sounds like you and her have a pretty interesting relationship, I would say Home Coming would work as a decent time to mention it to her.

Don’t expect a firm answer and if she does give you one, realize that it may change between now and then. Like I said in high school things change quickly, and by the time march comes you or her may have different girlfriends and boyfriends. I would recommend that you mention it at Home Coming, and leave it open ended to variables. Trust me you’ll be devastated if for the next 6 months you think you two are going together and at the last second she goes with her boyfriend or something.

Outside of that, it sounds like you’ve thought it through and it seems like a decent enough plan too me.